He is an engineer grown up in a difficult and broken home. His father was never there and left him and his mother homeless when he was a teenager, a time when he needed him most and he grew up with his alcoholic and prescription drug dependant mother. He grew up feeling empty and in need of love and recognition. Not knowing what was missing in his life he started a journey of looking for Truth and God.
The first thing he thought to do to find the Truth and peace that was missing, was to look to martial arts and the Way of the Peaceful Warrior, inspired by the programmes that seemed to illustrate this on TV. But after many years training with many 'masters', even from the Special Forces, it wasn't yet the missing piece that he sought.
Now at University but feeling lost, his Path to Truth in tatters, he had no idea what his next move would be. He was so focussed on finding Truth that he was not studying and he had no home to go back to. He desperately needed to find the Truth.
Walking late one night around the abandoned university sports campus a lovely blonde female student suddenly appeared like an angel and spoke to him as if she knew everything about him and the situation he was going through.
She had a genuine look of fearful worry on her face for him and this caught his attention. Her message was that Jesus was the Way and the Truth that he had been seeking.
It seemed more than just a coincidence at this critical and pivotal time in his life. But he didn't listen and was not to listen for many more lost years that would become increasingly perilous as he sought his own Way.
Spending days deeply studying the library's Religious encyclopedias he finally discovered Tibetan Buddhism. It seemed close to Shaolin Temple arts he loved due to the Buddhism connection. Perhaps he could find the real Truth there?
As if by fate, there was a Tibetan nun or 'sangha' coming to give a speech at the university so he attended and was taken aback by her embodiment of selflessness in her genuine happiness for him personally when he tithed the facility fee. 'She seemed selflessly happy for me for what I'd done, rather than personally grateful for the donation'. This seemed like embodiment of training to him so he was captivated. He decided to move into a Tibetan Monastery to find the Truth.
There he met Jiminez, an astounding person, reminiscent of Ramirez the trainer from the film 'Highlander' who was to train him towards his goal.
Training body and mind to the extreme. I had taken all the vows I could including even celibacy and chastity and all the Pratimoksha liberation vows. I also risked endangering my long-term health by a self-imposed 3 day fast from food and water whilst still training hard from 4am to midnight each day.
I saw more and more Truth and insight erupting around me.
He was at peace within himself, but he was uncomfortable there so he left thinking he could make his own path and find God in his own way.
He got lost back into the world back in his hated career as an office design engineer. He trained hard and at the same time decided to join the Special Forces 21 Squadron to focus on martial arts as a Path there. Despite being extremely fit he failed 'Selection' the first time due to exertion asthma.
With all his Paths shattered, he got lost back in the world where he met a girl who convinced him to go to Islam. But he couldn't find what he had been looking for there so he left both.
After another nine years of torturing himself in running and mountain training for his second attempt by trying to overcome asthma by shear force, he made it above all the other candidates only to be failed for imperfect eyesight! In the SAS they don't allow glasses or contact lenses.
He was at a crossroads in his life. The pattern of darkness was getting worse and worse and he knew that he was facing the end. Then he met a Christian lady that was to become his wife. Somehow all things came together to bring the final moment of Truth came into his life transforming the basis of it completely.
He was given the opportunity to be able to put his self aside and allow the Holy Spirit to fully manifest within him.
In the continuing moment I saw everything, eternity in our True essence; I experienced God's incredible love for me regardless of my mistakes and 'His' only wish for me to find peace and happiness. I saw through 'His' eyes as 'He' looked through mine at those around me (my self still set aside and out of the manifest equation), and the great love and compassion for all who are in exactly the same boat as I; a prisoner of the flesh, living as though this is all there is, when in fact there is Eternal Freedom within us, when the Ultimate Holy Spirit becomes manifest and fully known.
I saw that we are all under the same illusion: asleep in this body according to its senses which reinforce the false sense of ultimate self in the flesh, and living according to this lie and delusion throughout life because this is how it appears without further analysis.
I saw that the world that had appeared before was as a result of my own particular self that had come about because of my own unique experience of life and that the world could appear in any particular way depending on an individual's background. It was only in the Truth, that the true world appeared as experienced by the pure uncontaminated Holy Spirit within us when it is manifest.
Know this directly through experience and you'll experience Freedom through the Holy Spirit directly. This is the usual view of the world as from the pure child before fear and worry steps in. This fear and worry is only for the corporeal flesh-based self. Once fear enters, we move further and further from the Truth as our Spiritual eternal self is overridden again and again by fear. This is what the enemy hopes to achieve, so that none of us come alive in the Spirit and escape.
The one that looked through my eyes in the moment of Truth was timeless, eternal, pure and perfect. As I queried any meaning with my subtle mind accessing the Holy Spirit with concentration, I instantly received an answer to any question. I wondered who this was and saw an eternal light with no beginning or end, with my body like clothes hung on a clothes-line temporarily at this point and ready to be one day shrugged off. The light was indestructible and could not be affected by any matter, it was eternal.
I had met God-Truth head-on. I still had to wonder how to put it in worldly terms. Who should I follow, which Path should I chose? I thought back and saw how it was only ever Christians who had come to help me and how others had come without love but rather to destroy me.
I decided to make Jesus my Lord and Saviour because His life was based on love for us and He has already paid the price for all sin personally and therefore guarantees our eternal safety.
'You can't pick figs from thorn bushes'.
Our sense of self and own limited identity developed through our short lives limits our ability to achieve our own aspirations and dreams as we give into worry, fear and doubt. Overcome the illusion about how we really exist and we will be set FREE.
Tony's mission is to help others find Truth and motivate them to live at the level that they can achieve the things that God has set for them. In this world you can achieve anything as long as you believe and have faith.
It doesn't matter what you've done in the past, it doesn't matter how unworthy you might feel, just remember that in God's eyes we are all a work in progress. We all have second chances in our lives. If you accept jesus, He will make you new again as you are immediately forgiven all sins.
When you experience Truth, even if you didn't see the manifest person of Jesus at that time, you will know upon studying Jesus' words that when He spoke, it came from that very same fountain of Truth you experienced; the Father. We are all sons and daughters of God, capable of accessing God-Wisdom within us. No-one is greater than the Father who gave us this Truth. Jesus embodied the Father, so we are all servants of Jesus.
Your friends and family will find it hard to understand how you can have changed. They will see you as the same from their own mind and not believe it possible. But you will keep it a secret until they see the Truth for themselves. You cannot be a master in your own town. If you mention God they may hate you for it as they did me. Leave it in peace and in God's hands. Your job now is to do God's will and that is simply to work to FREE others from the ignorance that binds them.
“I finally understand why prayer works... I find myself getting everything I pray for. I guess I needed to have more faith for God to answer my prayers... My life has drastically changed for the better!
God helps me Spiritually when I'm down, Tony supports me Spiritually, because sometimes I can be wrong and he helps me when he speaks and I realise 'oh that's true', he helps me. God takes care of me everyday, He takes care of my kids and my husband and I feel blessed, I feel he walks with me every step I make, I'm blessed.